Jul 12, 2004
Yo! What's the dillio?? Yah, just playing around. So I'm bored and it's like 11:09 at night... WAY too early for me to actually think about going to sleep... So I'm thinkin about my grad. party on sunday... ehh it's gonna be way to crazy around here. ppl all over the place n stuff... so not fun! Too much is going on this week... Brandon's concert on Thurs. and my grad party on sunday... work on all the other days and still trying to get ready for it all! AHH! Then next weekend warped tour and the weekend after we go to NYC!! YAY! Can't wait til then! One whole week offa work and just getting a chance to chill out in NYC! So i think I got Mark mad at me, cuz I haven't talked to him since that one time like a week and a half ago when we talked online and he tried to IM me one other time and I wasn't home but I left my comp. on cuz I was sending pics... and when I got back he said fine don't tlak to me I don't want to talk to u anymore and ever since then he hasn't said anything to me... kinda childish I know.... but he didn't listen when I said I was gone but just left my comp. on! Well HELP ME!! I dunno what to do about it! Anyway I dunno what to type!! PEACE OUT!
Posted at 09:20 pm by xXpunk_chickXx
Mar 24, 2004
Go shorty, it's my birfday!
Well... not really my birthday until tomorrow! HAPPY BIRFDAY TO ME, even though it's gonna suck @ss, cuz I gosta go to work and schtuff... ehh! My manager... a little slow... asks me if I want to come in early when I tell her that my birthday is da 25th. umm do you really think I want to? Heck no! But of course I can't say no so I of course say yes... what is my other option? And now I gotta work at 2:30 tomorrow and it's gonna suck cuz I work into the night and afterward i can't go any place cuz everyone is gonna say it's too late cuz they SUCK!!! But anyway... So i was reading my old entries and some of the stuff I never remember writing... kinda strange huh? I think imma post my pics of ppl me n my friend met... like the cool people, not the evil ones... we've met too many celebrities. People are beginning to think we're celebrity stalkers but we're really not... it just kinda happens. I'll post some pics when I feel like it. so we got blink tickets the other day too! I can't wait.. there's like almost 2 months but it's gonna be SO rad!! Oh yah, and I got the Blink-182 DVD the other day too... it's purdy funny! God I wish I was in a band.. that would be rad! Hopefully I can get one together over the summer. Well I'm gonna go away now... gotta scan some pics for all you ppl to look at! Peace out!
Posted at 07:09 pm by xXpunk_chickXx
Mar 6, 2004
Yo yo homies! What's the dillio?? Well it's only 9:02... still purdy early for a saturday nite! I went to see "Twisted" tonight... it was purdy good, definatly not what I thought it was going to turn out to be... but I good movie, and now that I'm home I can't find anything to do but go through my sound effects on my new program to make a remix of some songs. Fun fun! And guess what... I FOUND OUT BLINK 182 IS COMING!!!!! YAY!!!! I'm so freaking excited! I haven't seen a blink show but I've been a fan for such a long time and when I can finally go i didn't see a date for here and I was so mad but they just announced em yesterday for Minnesota so I'm psyched! So my day was good... I'm happy, happy happy!!! YAY! I'll type more when I can think straight... hmm... PEACE for now!
Posted at 07:08 pm by xXpunk_chickXx
Feb 24, 2004
Alrite, so I've been planning on getting my hair cut for a heck of a long time, and I finally got it done today... YAY! It's shorter than I would normally cut it... but hey, it's cool. Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah! I need to make this a little more interesting! Oh yeah, and I got my 8th piercing today... suprisingly it's only the cartilage on my ear... I can't believe I didn't get it done sooner than this. Not too bad though. School sucks @ss, as usual... it's so boring and most of the stuff they teach us is pointless... not to mention I've missed WAY too much! Eh, that's alrite, I don't care anyway, just as long as I graduate. Oh yeah, I forgot... now I'm not this kinda person who's like a reading FREAK or anyhting, but I've been reading a few books in my spare time during school, anything but school work, and there's these 2 awesome books, one is "You Don't Know Me" By David Klass i think... it's really weird... kinda like me, and the other one I just started is called "Cut" n it's a really good story so far. Oh yah, and I went to guitar last night, and it was fun n all like normal... right now we're doing bends and adding them with slides and hammer on's and hammer off's and it's sounding purdy cool... gotsta work on those bends... they could be better. Okay, okay... my life isn't seeming and more interesting now... so I'm gonna put ya outta ur misery and end this boring entry... I'll type another poem in here that I submitted to a literary magazine. Here it goes... PEACE!
This Is Me
Sometimes I feel as if nobody cares,
Like no one understands what I see
Sometimes I tink about the past
and wonder if I was right or if I was wrong.
But no one feels the way I feel
No one knows what I go through. Everyday,
People act like they care, but I know they don't
Why can't you know how I feel?
Why can't I explain this to you?
I just want one person to care,
Someone who understands my thoughts
As I spend my day alone in my room
Tears of pain and lonliness overcome me
But there's no one to tell
I don't know how to express this,
To tell you how I feel
Or how real this feeling actually is.
If only I could share this with someone.
People say a smile says everything
But when I smile, it's not always real.
How can you tell, I fake it so well
You'll never know, or understand
The real me.
Posted at 07:21 pm by xXpunk_chickXx
Feb 21, 2004
Alrite... here is a poem I wrote for school...I'll put one on here everyday if I can remember! I'm all for CONSTRUCTIVE criticism, but if you're coming on here just to be a complete jerk and say "that sucks" you can find some other place to go, I'm NOT for that! If you have any suggestions or CONSTRUCTIVE criticism then go for it. I'll type a little afterward about where I got the idea from...here I go, check it:
Everyday I think about
All the thoughts I hid from you
You thought you knew what I thought of you,
But all that was a mask I hid behind.
No matter what I thought of you
I still considered us friends to the end,
Until you stabbed me in the back,
Over and over twisting the knife
Deeper inside me everytime.
What kind of friend betrays you
After nine years and stil
Considers themselves your best friend?
But even thought you've done so much wrong,
I can still walk away with more dignity than you.
This poem was about a friend I had since 1st grade and after all those years had to go and lie about anything and everything she could and then lie to my face and say she never did it. I got the idea from Linkin Park's song "Hit The Floor".
Posted at 07:48 pm by xXpunk_chickXx
Wow! Long time no entry for little ol' me! Well, a lot has been going on since I last wrote in here... I went to see Linkin Park on January 31st... me and my Shelliean had backstage passes so we got to meet the band and they were purdy awesome! The concert rocked too! I loved every minute of it! This thursday (feb 19) I went to see Mest, Fall Out Boy, Dynamite Boy and Matchbook Romance... GREAT show as well... the SHOW, not the club or the security or anything else about the concert. The security at the Quest is the worst security ever! The chick in front of me was a complete BIZATCH, not to mention she took up half the front row! But all in all the PERFORMANCES were great and Nick (Mest's drummer) was really nice and let us get a pic with him before soundcheck. The next concert for me isn't until July, unless another comes up... but when I go to Warped Tour it should be awesome too! FINALLY THEY COME TO MN! YAY! My guitar playing has really improved... I feel just a teeny bit bad for saying this but Brandon is a better guitar teacher than Dennis, just because I feel like I'm actually IMPROVING with Brandon, and with Dennis I just felt like I was learning songs and not techniques that will help me when I have my own band. I did say WHEN! I'm planning on working on that over the summer b4 I go to college! But 4 now imma jet, I'll be sure to write more later!
Posted at 07:26 pm by xXpunk_chickXx
Aug 26, 2003
Ehh... this is my last week off before I have to go back to school and it sucks! I still have to finish doing my shopping and getting everything ready to go back and I really not looking forward to it anymore. At first I thought it would be alrite, but now that I'm thinking about it, it really is gonna suck. Being my last year and all I thought it would be fun, but now that I think about it I don't want to be around my "friends" anymore... and I don't think they really want to be around me anyway. haha... I like to complain. I dunno if that's a good thing though? I always find something to complain about and I think it's get's a little irritating. Oh yeah... so I went to watch my aunt's dog this weekend... and when her and her new husband (whom I don't think I like very much) came home, and for some odd reason we started talking about colleges... I mentioned one of the colleges that I had recently recieved an application to and my aunts stupid husband said to me, " are you sure you have good enough grades to get in and are you sure you can afford it"? HELLO man! You don't know anything about my grade and how much I can afford for a college and what the heck, is my aunt telling you I'm dumb?? I dunno it just really bothered me! But anyway... I'll be back later to type more... too many things going on at once! PEACE!
Posted at 11:12 am by xXpunk_chickXx
Aug 22, 2003
Friday... YAY! I'm glad it's friday! I'm going to my aunts this weekend... unfortunatly I have a long drive ahead of me. But that's cool... there's a pool at my aunt's house (hee hee) and at least I won't be bored. I was listening to a song called "Hey Dad" yesterday... and the lyrics to that song are like exactally how I feel... I'll put the lyrics up on here and y'all can read them. Did I just say "y'all"? That's a scary thought! Well I suppose before I put the lyrics up I better explain myself... Ahem... I've always lived without my biological father, right now I live with my mom and step-dad, and when I was younger I lived with my mom and my Grandma. I never really knew my real dad, and even though he lived about 30 minutes away from me for most of my life, I saw him about 7 or 8 times and in those 7 or 8 times it was always either so my step-dad and him could watch boxing matches together on TV, and 2 of those times I went to Christmas with him where he said about 3 words to me. He recently moved to another state, and now that I'm older and can make my own decisions and I am actually aware of what has been going on these past years, he thinks that we can have a "relationship" and be father and daughter like we should have been the last 17 years. His father acted the same way toward him as he acts towards me and he doesn't understand why I don't want to be in a relationship with him, and get hurt like I know I will. I know he'll try to call and talk to me and all and then all of a sudden when we have a good relationship and he quits calling and talking to me. But anyway... here's the lyrics to the song and it pretty much sums up how I feel.
Hey Dad Where have you been for so long?
Why won't you look at me?
Is there something wrong?
Do you you remember me, the son that you conceived?
Why won't you look at me?
the son that you deceived?
Oh God, what did I do to deserve this?
A man I never knew
A man I cannot miss
How can we start all over when we never began?
How can you be a father?
you're not even a man?
I gave you many chances, many that you took
Now I stand before you
You won't even look
So then came kids of my own
I was there for them
I am the man you couldn't be, I didn't learn from him
Where he is now I don't know at all
I Don't even remember
the last time that he called
Where have you been?
Well... that's all for today! PEACE!
Posted at 11:20 am by xXpunk_chickXx
Aug 21, 2003
Hey Hey!! Well I just realized it's been a while since I've been on here and posted something.... anything really, probably cuz I was just waiting for something interesting to happen and my god something did! Yesterday was probably the best day I've had in a long time... we went to an amusement park... hee hee... that was amusing! When I got home I found out the BEST news ever!! Good Charlotte is coming on tour!!! Within 5 minutes of finding out I had already bought tickets! Watch out Good Charlotte... Here I come!! Speaking of Good Charlotte... I'm watching TV and there's some new movie coming out and of course they have to have a GC song in hte movie... That gets kinda irritating after a while, considering people who like just that one song will go out and buy the cd and not even bother listening to their older stuff and consider themselves die-hard fans when we all know damn well the only reason they like them is because they think they're hot. But anyway... I don't think I have any more to add for now, hopefully I'll have something to add tomorrow! LOL! PEACE BABY!
Posted at 12:24 pm by xXpunk_chickXx
Aug 15, 2003
Well, today wasn't the best day ever! In the few years since my beloved dog died, I've never been so upset about it. I regret that night the most out of everything I've ever done. I don't know if I should feel guilty or not... but everytime I think about it I feel worse and worse. I just wish I would have left my friend's house so I could have seen him for the last time. Now I never know what might have happened. But on to the next subject... that one is too depressing. I've been downloading a ton of songs lately, haven't decided what band I like better, The Clash, The Cure, Rancid, NoFX, MXPX, too many to choose from. But nobody can ever beat GC, Mest and Simple Plan. I can't wait till Good Charlotte goes on tour with Mest and supposidly Eve6, which I find pretty funny since when Good Charlotte was first starting out THEY opened for Eve6. Does that mean your career is going down-hill when you open up for a band that used to open up for you?? Heard a new band thanxs to my online buddy :-D. I'm gonna try to find out some more info about them. Far From Heros is their name... they have 2 songs I've heard and as far as I know they're unsigned. Too bad... I think they could make it! I'll try to find out more about them and let ya know! Love, peace and chicken grease! LOL... PEACE!
P.S. Have you ever thought maybe I have family who reads this and maybe some of this family isn't that old and they maybe if I put *** they won't get the full context and won't know exactally what I'm trying to say... I do try to be a good influence on my younger family members.
Posted at 11:14 pm by xXpunk_chickXx